Loneliness is a universal emotion that we’ve all experienced at some point, even when surrounded by others. For those living abroad or away from their inner circle, this feeling becomes especially hard during weekends and holidays.
Loneliness often stems from a disconnect between our desired social connections and reality. You could be at a lively party filled with people, yet still feel deeply alone.
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After living in many places, I’ve learned the hard way that my social circle is a foundational pillar for my well-being. It directly impacts whether I perceive my environment more positively or negatively.
The Loneliness Epidemic According to the Federal Statistical Office in Germany, one in six people over the age of 18 feels lonely – that’s around 12.2 million people, and it is even more prevalent among the younger population between 18 and 29 years old.
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Being a social person myself, when I moved to Frankfurt, I lost my community, and then when COVID-19 struck, I felt the void and the lack of deep connections, it was brutal. But here’s what I learned: Even with Germanic cultural differences, there is one thing that is contagious and universally recognisable: Authenticity.
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Loneliness Can’t Survive Genuine Connections
Often, when people meet someone new, the first thing they do is recite their entire resume as if they were in a job interview. This often leads the conversation to a superficial level. You might be very successful, but more often than not, when conversations stay solely on the professional level, they become more transactional than genuine. People put on masks because they are simply trying to fit in. However, deep connections happen with authenticity – a dash of vulnerability and removing those masks and labels is how you truly connect with others.
Respecting Boundaries
Most of us were raised in family systems where anyone’s problems were everybody’s problems, leading us to become adults with blurred boundaries. Healthy relationships have good boundaries.
To build meaningful relationships, respect others’ boundaries and don’t push them to share things they aren’t comfortable with – that will ultimately damage the connection, not deepen it.
Active Listening and Loneliness
A big part of being a good listener is truly engaging with what the other person is saying. People like to be around good listeners because it makes them feel heard and understood. If you want to learn how to connect with others, this tip is a great way to start.
Seeking Community Support
Last but not least, engage with people, talk to strangers, and become part of a support group that helps to lift you up – there are many out there.
In my case, I found a great connection within my yoga community in Frankfurt. I had to reach out to people, reinforce the existing connections I created here, and put myself out there, and I still do.
If you’re feeling lonely, consider joining a supportive community like Growth Nation for free – an English support group in Germany. Alternatively, you could attend A Social Workout – a free monthly English meet-up in Frankfurt that’s a healthy place to meet new people.
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